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Bones

I saw this skull on a gravestone when we went to Cley church for an art exhibition including my friend Jane Wheeler's nice big painting. I'd already called this post 'bones' so skull seemed right. Although the bones I'm referring to are mine as I had a bone scan and now have osteoporosis which was alarming, and just more crap to deal with.

Furthermore the GP I saw suggested that I had enough going on without having further treatment for that (in addition I’m on 2 drugs that both have a bad effect on bone density so that doesn’t seem right), and he also proposed that exercise was not necessary as long as you moved around the house. Contrary to all current guidelines that I'm aware of for COPD and bone health. I'll be seeing another GP.

I also got a call from my GP surgery to make an appointment to discuss the results of my blood tests from Papworth; those were in April! If they want to discuss them that means there’s something wrong and I’m really not clear why it takes almost 4 months to get results. Doesn’t inspire confidence. Nor does waiting over 4 months- and counting- for an angiogram. I’m trying not to get overwhelmed with anxiety and gloom about it all. Although I undertook an ill considered experiment with my steroids this week and experienced some hellish ‘withdrawal’ symptoms (your body stops producing it’s own cortisol with long term steroid use) so I’ve not been in the best frame of mind.

Despite all that I will be able to retire to my living room in the warmth of my Elephant’s Breath paint, although despite the TV domination I didn't succumb to watching the World Cup! I'm not sure that England’s success - albeit not enough to win - is any sign as some say of a cohesive country, it’s more despite the current divisions; I think I read this week something along the lines that England’s identity ended with the miners strike.

I don’t feel that I have any national identity although I’m sure I used to feel proud of being British. Not any more. When we go to France in August (although more cause for anxiety as I don’t think I can get travel insurance at the moment due to being in the middle of diagnostic tests). I’ll be pleased that at least my passport is still burgundy so I won’t be glaringly obviously a blue passport idiot although I’ll still feel ashamed to be British. Who wouldn’t? At this time if you think Brexit is a good idea you should be too ashamed to leave the country, and why would you want to go to the ‘continent’ anyway? Enough already!

Interesting how the Trump visit is being framed; Trump appears to be seeing the protests as a symptom of Britain’s and the Government’s ‘chaos’. So rather than accepting the protests for antipathy towards him for his far-right, racist and misogynistic positions, he’s able to view them as evidence of the Brexit turmoil and the far-right and liberal divide. All the security surrounding him is therefore to protect him from the uprising hordes rather than being seen as virulent anti- Trump protests. The US is also warning American citizens in the UK to steer clear of the protesters in case of violence! Although I wouldn’t be surprised if the vile Britain First lot turn up to cause trouble. And apparently Trump might meet Boris Johnson; I dislike the way that Trump is trying to interfere in our politics.

Love Island continues to be a lightness in the dark- although I’ve managed to persuade Martin to persevere with The Crown (I’m enjoying seeing Churchill able to carry on despite the opposition to his age, but the smoking everywhere is just unbelievable) - which I look forward to every day!

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